ichoosefight: (🌱 i hate waiting)
Stephanie Brown ([personal profile] ichoosefight) wrote2010-10-21 05:36 pm

13 - Text - A good dose of nihilism

[ Private to Tim, Cissie, Claire, separately ]

I want to ask a perfectly serious question, in no way meant to imply anything about anyone, ever, so don't read into it.

Why are you still here?
peektuttut: (T; Cat in tree? ROBIN SENSE TINGLING)

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[personal profile] peektuttut 2010-10-21 09:49 pm (UTC)(link)
I made a deal.

What's wrong?

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-21 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)
But you can quit at any time, right? So you think there's something to be gained from staying here.
peektuttut: (E; I'm looking for some shit kay.)

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[personal profile] peektuttut 2010-10-21 09:54 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't really like calling it quits halfway through things. Besides, Sylar needs the help.

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-21 09:55 pm (UTC)(link)
So you're staying to help Sylar.
peektuttut: (T; What a thoughtful Boy Genius)

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[personal profile] peektuttut 2010-10-21 10:02 pm (UTC)(link)
More or less. What brought this on?

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-21 10:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Just... everything. It feels weird, being here, with everything that happens. Like a lost cause.
peektuttut: (RR; Holding hands can be kind of nice)

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[personal profile] peektuttut 2010-10-21 10:08 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not. Some cases are more difficult than others, but it's not. People graduate.

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-21 10:10 pm (UTC)(link)
And what then? Do we really know what happens? People come back, people lose their memories, people are just plain dead. What are we actually accomplishing here?
peektuttut: (T; And that's how you make a flux capaci)

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[personal profile] peektuttut 2010-10-21 10:13 pm (UTC)(link)
For all we know, this could be a colossal waist of time. But when we go back, it's to right where we left off. Even if we lose our memories, maybe it still affects us.

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cisskabob: (That can't be good)

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[personal profile] cisskabob 2010-10-22 01:28 am (UTC)(link)
Brutal honesty? I've got no reason to leave.

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 01:29 am (UTC)(link)
And you're happier here than you might be somewhere else?
cisskabob: (all dressed up & nowhere to go)

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[personal profile] cisskabob 2010-10-22 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
...I'm happier here than I was at home, yeah. I've got more friends and psuedo-family here. I've got a purpose here, even if I've been screwed over once already, at least.

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 01:39 am (UTC)(link)
Surely there are other places you could go, though...
cisskabob: (Sideways)

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[personal profile] cisskabob 2010-10-22 02:02 am (UTC)(link)
Other than here or home? Probably. But would we know each other at home? Probably not. I wouldn't know Molly, or Murphy, or Sylar, or Gabriel, or Bruce or anyone else I've gotten to know here. I wouldn't be talking with Tim like I do. I don't know where I'd go or what I'd do if I left. And now I've been working for the last month or so to prove to Bela I'm not going anywhere, so--I'm not going anywhere.

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not saying you should, I'm just curious.
cisskabob: (Downhearted Cissie)

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[personal profile] cisskabob 2010-10-22 02:07 am (UTC)(link)
I know. I'm just... saying. It sucks here sometimes, but... I really don't want to leave. And I know I'm in the minority because of that.

...Can I ask why the curiosity?

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 02:09 am (UTC)(link)
I'm just... frustrated. With everything. There's so much stuff happening here it makes my head spin.

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[Spam] <3!

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[Spam] <3!

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[Spam] <3!

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[identity profile] some-kinda-hero.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 03:19 am (UTC)(link)
I have a responsibility to my Inmate. I have this ability and I'm supposed to do something with it, and while it doesn't go to use every day here like I could back home at a hospital or something, it certainly has it's perks. I came here thinking I would hunt down the bad guys...I just had to alter my motives some.

Why?

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
I'm just... trying to figure it out myself, I guess.

What do you mean, you thought you could hunt down the bad guys?

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[identity profile] some-kinda-hero.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 04:14 am (UTC)(link)
Then I'll help you try.

I was attacked and I wanted him to pay. I wanted all of them to pay. But after I started going after them, I realized how stupid it was to do it alone because it fell apart, it went horribly wrong and I only caused more trouble for my family than good.

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 04:22 am (UTC)(link)
[ She is relating so hard right now. ] That sort of thing works better when you've got a team to back you up. Or at least a friend.

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[identity profile] some-kinda-hero.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 04:26 am (UTC)(link)
I know that now. Just had to learn the really sucky way.

[Course, Meredith died anyway, just not by Doyle's puppeteer hands.]

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 04:28 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I know how that is. At least you don't have any scars to show for it. [ Physical ones, anyway. Mmm, morbid humor. ]

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[identity profile] some-kinda-hero.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 04:31 am (UTC)(link)
[She gets a laugh, but just barely.] Yeah.

How do you know, Stephanie?

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[identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com 2010-10-22 04:36 am (UTC)(link)
You haven't tried to hide any. [ It's as much a guess as anything, but she's curious about that tone. Stephanie has makeup over her scars. She hadn't noticed any when they hung out before. ]

Why, have some you want to show off?

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