02 - Even weirder than usual weird

[ichoosefight]

So, I found a dead body?

[ Her voice is utterly uncertain and confused. She was told that people came back here, but the woman on the bed behind her is very apparently dead. And she's been that way for a while.

Steph turns the camera around to show Sylvanas, draped over her own bed. At least, Steph assumes it's hers, since she was half in the door when Steph got there. She was kind enough to drag the body to the nearest comfortable surface for revival. Dead bodies are heavy, man. And so are undead comatose bodies. ]

She's supposed to come back, right? 'Cause I've been waiting for a good couple of minutes now and she's still pretty dead.

Did somebody leave out a few details in Orientation?

Comments

[ichoosefight]

Spoilsport.

[ She keeps her taser at the ready while she tucks herself into that door corner. Can't give up a good shield. ]

[tentacruelest]

[Once inside, Jones' temper dissipates in favor of the task in front of him. He ignores Stephanie, even turning his back to her; evidently he doesn't feel she's too much of a threat. He's never faced a taser before, wouldn't know what one was even if he saw it.

Instead he kneels down to check over Sylvanas, determining if she's truly dead or only locked in sleep. Once satisfied it's the latter, he begins to gather her up in his arms to take to the infirmary. Even without his powers, he's always been a very strong old fish]

[ichoosefight]

Learn some manners, Grumpy Gills.

[ Okay so maybe she's a little freaked by his strength. He's basically Cthulu she thinks she's allowed. ]

[tentacruelest]

[The relief coursing through him about both beating Arthas here as well as his relative ease in making his way through the door both serve to temper Jones' near-constant rage. He straightens up, Sylvanas in arms, and gives Stephanie an annoyed look and a raised eyebrow]

Get the door.

[ichoosefight]

Say please, fish man.

[ She is pointing that taser at him. He's got his hands full so she figures she has the advantage. ]

/Irisjack

[routemistress]

[And here's Iris, ready to get the door so Steph doesn't have to drop her defensive stance.]

She's got a point, Spongebob. Were there any need to come it with the threats right off like that?

[tentacruelest]

Captains do not beg the courtesy of impudent children.

The door.

[routemistress]

What makes you think you're entitled to courtesy from any bugger, you pompous great snail?

[But she's holding the door open.]

Show some to others and you might get a bit back. I know that'd get in the way of your soggy martyr complex, but still.

[ichoosefight]

And you're not my captain, either.

[tentacruelest]

[Entirely less than thrilled at seeing Iris alive, Jones grunts and limps his way to the door, gentle as feathers with Sylvanas' still body]

Witch, I don't need you instructing me on common courtesy. Yeh deserve none.

Look after your whelp lest I feel the need to come back and teach her a lesson she won't soon forget.

[routemistress]

[Iris' smile flashes out, seraphically pleased.]

Sweetheart. You touch a hair on Steph's 'ead and it won't be me that pounds you into squid jam. Even Babs'd 'ave to wait in line be'ind 'er warden.

Me point stands. She did nothing but try and 'elp; were there any need for threats?

[ichoosefight]

[ Steph raises her eyebrows at Iris. ]

Wow, can I tase him just for fun? You have to admit he's totally asking for it.

[tentacruelest]

And who's her warden that I should be so afraid?

[Continuing to sneer, Jones makes it successfully out into the hall. He bristles at Steph's threat, prepared to drop his precious cargo and rip out her throat at the first sign of trouble]

She locked the door. She was purposely an obstacle. Keep her in check, Wildthyme.

[routemistress]

Doctor Banner. I think you met the day you arrived, didn't you?

[The sweetest smile.]

She locked the door because she doesn't know you from Adam, you great numpty. It's called keeping the comatose lady safe from anyone that might've wanted to eat 'er liver in 'er sleep. 'Ow you even fit your 'ead that far up your arse I will never know.

...and don't want to think about, actually. Go on. Piss off.

sweet jesus since when was I next in line

[ichoosefight]

Oh please, like Iris can keep me in check.

[ As if to prove it, she sticks her tongue out at him behind his back. ]

<3

[tentacruelest]

[Snarling and fuming at Iris, Jones is distracted by the urgency in removing Sylvanas to the infirmary. He turns with a massive sweep of his ship cloak and storms off, in a fouler mood than ever]

<3 <3

[routemistress]

[Iris hasn't really stopped wanting to hug Steph since she arrived; she continues to not do so, but she grins across at her.]

That's my girl. I wouldn't dream of trying to, any road.

...who else'd you get into it with? Spongebob never gave you them bruises.

8|

[ichoosefight]

[ She grins at Iris, then winces and brings a hand up to rub at her cheek bruise. It isn't so bad she wasn't hoping it would be gone before she saw Iris again. ]

Nobody! We were just sparring.

[/motherhennage]

[routemistress]

Sparring with nobody, eh? All right. I know you can 'andle yourself, love. I just know what a few of the people 'ere are like, that's all.

...I keep meaning to get a bit better on the unarmed side meself. I can 'old me own end up in a barfight all right, but folk like you and Babs and Bea make me look like a chairleg in a gunfight.

[/teenagerage]

[ichoosefight]

Plus I have the taser if I need it. Which I didn't, because it was just a friendly sparring match between me and Dent.

[routemistress]

[She narrows her eyes when Steph names a name; because fond as she is of Dent, Iris hasn't forgotten Cassel.]

Steph. Swear to me you agreed to that. I've got attached to 'im - both of 'im - but 'e's got history picking on people smaller than 'imself.

[ichoosefight]

I suggested it in the first place. Come on, I finally got all my stitches out, I was feeling restless.

[ And now she has a busted rib to show for it. ]

[routemistress]

[Iris nods. Steph doesn't remotely give the impression of telling a lie.]

Aye, it can get like that round 'ere. And last time 'e picked on someone unwilling Ivy pretty much nailed 'im to the floor. 'E's an arse but 'e's never been a stupid one.

[She says this with evident fondness.]

Still. You will let Bruce or me know if anyone gets too much, won't you? And I've got hot tubs up in the spa if you want to soak your bruises at all.

[ichoosefight]

Sure, of course. [ No she won't. She holds up the taser again for good measure. ] And I am armed.

A hot tub sounds amazing right now, though.