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[ichoosefight]

"I'm not here right now, but leave me a message and I'll call you right back!"

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[ichoosefight]

I think that's called 'normal life', but I wouldn't really know. I never had one.

[tucky]

Something about how you talk sometimes just bugs me. I don't know. I can't put my finger on it. It ain't just a you thing, don't worry; it's a lot of people.

[ichoosefight]

Well, you try to stick up for everybody, all the time. I guess I just don't have that kind of faith in humanity.

[tucky]

Not everybody. And not all the time.

[ichoosefight]

It seems like it, sometimes.

[tucky]

I wanna listen and understand all the time; that ain't the same thing.

I wanna stick up for inmates when they're being ignored or treated like shit.

[ichoosefight]

That's great and all, but sometimes they don't need the defense you give them.

[tucky]

I'm not talking about acting like they're perfect and innocent.

[ichoosefight]

I'm just saying, being called immature isn't really a dire insult.

[tucky]

Oh, that.

It's bigger than you think it is. It, like... it represents something. Sometimes I think you don't get what a big deal it is to be stuck here.

[ichoosefight]

It represents behaving like a child. And I've been stuck here, I know what it's like.

[tucky]

Do you? 'Cause I don't think you do. I didn't when I was an inmate.

Call it nasty and cruel and awful, 'cause it's all those things, but it ain't childish.

[ichoosefight]

Oh, and now that you're a warden you have a perfect understanding? Just because other people might have it worse doesn't mean our experiences aren't valid and real. And just because a guy has a sad grown-up story doesn't mean his lashing out isn't still childish behavior.

[tucky]

I'm not talking about growing up and sad stories, I'm talking about now. I'm talking about getting trapped here and not knowing when you're gonna get to leave, and getting talked down to all the time, and having to deal with floods and breaches and shit. And don't say we have to deal with that shit too, 'cause we got a choice.

It's not fucking childish to be pissed about that. It ain't childish to fight back.

[ichoosefight]

We did have to deal with it Tiff, do you not remember? 'Cause I remember. I remember being angry, and scared, and sad, and confused.

And I remember the juvenile crap I did trying to deal with it, and it's not fighting back. It doesn't accomplish anything. Your plan doesn't become good if it sticks it to the man. It becomes good when you think farther ahead than step two.

I died fighting a stupid fight, trying to stop a stupid war I started because I was too childish to think about what I was actually doing and what it would actually accomplish. And you know? I think that gives me a little bit of authority when it comes to deciding what's childish and what's not.

[tucky]

We did before, but we don't now. And dealing with it before don't make it right for us to shit all over the people who're still fucking stuck.

[She grits her teeth and jumps up from the couch, pacing.]

Christ, Steph, I'm not saying it was a good plan. But fighting and being pissed here ain't the same as throwing a tantrum 'cause your mama grounded you.

[ichoosefight]

I have a right to be angry, too! Just because I have the option of packing up and leaving doesn't mean that nothing that happens here affects me, or that there aren't people just as stuck who now have to deal with their things being destroyed who didn't ask for it to happen.

I don't care how serious your circumstances are. I don't care if someone has a frickin gun to your head, you're still responsible for your own behavior.

[tucky]

I know! I know! I'm not excusing shit, Steph; you don't fucking get it. I ain't saying they're not responsible. I'm saying it's. Not. Childish.

[ichoosefight]

Mature adults don't blow shit up for no reason.

[tucky]

Mature adults don't say stuff happens for no reason just 'cause it's a reason they don't get!

[ichoosefight]

Mature adults don't try desperately to validate bad reasoning.

[tucky]

Jesus Christ! Are you fucking stupid or do you got cotton in your ears?! I hated that they did that shit! They blew up the kitchens; they blew up the infirmary! People I care about got hurt! And I helped stop fires and heal hurt people and clean up after - where were you?

[That isn't really a fair question - she knows it's very possible that Steph had been helping out, and their paths had just never crossed.]

[ichoosefight]

Unconscious, in the infirmary. I only woke up, like, yesterday. So be mad! Don't waste your time making excuses for a couple of idiots who don't have any to make for themselves!

fff WHOOPS that was my OOC mistake; we'll say Tiffany forgot thanks to hot-headedness

[tucky]

You're not listening to a fucking word I'm saying.

Why are you even here? You don't wanna listen to people. You don't wanna help anybody. You just wanna mock and play around.

aye aye Cap'n

[ichoosefight]

I'm listening, you're just not talking sense. Don't tell me I don't want to help just because I'm not naive enough to think I can do it by wishing really hard.