05 - She didn't stand a waffle's chance in the kitchen

[ichoosefight]

[ Stephanie has been experimenting with her waffle makers. You can tell, because her desk has been entirely cleared of anything that is not waffles. The mess is pretty massive. What hasn't been burned is leaky slop. ]

Okay, I give up. I've never actually cooked anything outside of a microwave.

Can anybody teach me how to make waffles without burning them to a crisp?

[ooc| 4th wall day post, forward-dated because I am interested in actual barge people responses~ ]

Comments

[angriestbird]

I'm sure Alfred could, if he thought you were worth teaching.

[ That'd be the new Robin. And he's a tiny, angry dick. ]

[ichoosefight]

[ what

what what what ]

Who the hell are you, and how do you know Alfred?

[angriestbird]

He's my manservant.

[ He's your father's manservent you little prick. ]

Have you been injured? You've appeared to have lost weight. Which is good-- saving you while you resemble beached whale was no small accomplishment.

[ichoosefight]

[ ...Well okay, Alfred is a pretty common name, but he's wearing a mask and she's pretty sure there aren't that many Alfreds working for people in masks. Has she been injured? Well, yes, kind of a lot. Lost weight? Again, yes, but how would he know that?

And why the hell is he making a fat joke? ]

Who are you?

[angriestbird]

Have you lost your mind?

[ He pulls his mask off. ]

You know who I am!

[ichoosefight]

[ There is zero recognition in her face as she shakes her head. ]

No, I really don't.

video;

[some_kinda_hero]

[Wherein she looks stunned. And not the good sort.] Stephanie...please tell me you're not back on the Barge...?

[surfaceshine]

[Dean is peering through the communicator. Yes. Like changing his angle on his end will actually show him more on her end.]

And you said begging was premature.

First thing's first: do you have a fire extinguisher?

video;

[ichoosefight]

Back?

[ Sorry friend, no recognition here. Just a sort of resignation. ]

No, I'm not back. I'm dead. It's different.

[ichoosefight]

That's a no. I mean, they're not on fire. Just kind of... charcoal-y.

[dublinbrogue]

Hey there princess, since when cant you cook?

[ichoosefight]

Since... the day I was born? And that's Empress to you, stranger.

[hellofist]

Maybe... don't cook as long?

[ichoosefight]

[ That's a voice Steph would recognize even in her sleep. She can't put names to all of the feelings going through her at once. Fear, guilt, shame, hope, love, despair, among others. The actual words don't even really register. Her voice cracks. ]

Cass?

video;

[some_kinda_hero]

[She leans back so far and jerks so fast that she almost falls out of her chair.] You're an Inmate?!

[What the fuck? And apparently with Barge amnesia...it's too much for Claire.]

video;

[ichoosefight]

[ Well that's sure a reaction. She almost feels bad for the girl. ]

Yeah. I'm not whatever version of me you know. Sorry.

[angriestbird]

Damian! Damian Wayne! Robin!

Oh My God, you've got amnesia. You were storing what passed for intelligence in your fat.

[ichoosefight]

Robin?

[ Well now she's just concerned, and a little sad. She hadn't thought about who would be Robin after she was fired.

Come to think of it, did she even know Bruce Wayne had a kid? Weird. ]

Tim didn't come back?

[angriestbird]

What? Tim is Red Robin. He went solo some time ago, while wallowing in delusions about Father.

...what happened to you? Why aren't you in your little fake cave?

[ichoosefight]

Oh. [ That's... well, kind of a relief, but mostly confusing. So Tim is Robin, and Bruce has a kid, and the kid is Robin too? What even is her life. ]

I died. I'm dead. And I've never heard of you, so I don't know what you're talking about.

[surfaceshine]

Charcoal comes before the fire. Safety first.

[ichoosefight]

Okay. And where do I obtain a fire extinguisher?

[angriestbird]

You're not dead. You've annoyed me quite recently.

[ so what the hell is this ]

[ichoosefight]

I'm dead. Black Mask shot me and I bled to death in his gross dungeon basement. Even if that mark isn't there I've got a hundred more to show for it. He didn't exactly make it quick.

[ Don't make her take her shirt off Damian, she will do it. She has no shame. ]

[angriestbird]

You didn't die. Jason, he died. That harridan Thompkins lied and smuggled you out because she was angry at Father. Honestly, did you fall on your head? I know your acrobatics are terrible, but this is dumb, even for you.